In an ideal scenario you would quit working entirely to focus on your health, but I’m guessing this is not an option.

You need to focus on the body first. The most important is sleep, but that is also difficult to address directly, so it’s best to focus on diet and exercise. You’ll likely have to design your entire day and week around these two things.

Try the Whole 30 program first. It’s a way of eating that eliminates inflammation causing foods. DONT TRY TO LOSE WEIGHT! Weight loss is important for overall health but you’ll usually sleep worse during a weight loss phase. That said you’ll probably lose weight naturally anyway.

Give up the alcohol for 30 days and consider weening off caffeine at some point since both of these will mess up your sleep.

For exercise, you just have to find something enjoyable enough to do at least 3x per week. It really doesn’t matter what it is as long as it makes you a bit sore. Consistency is key - don’t overdo it by jumping into something like CrossFit.

Lastly, WHY are you burning yourself out? Are you afraid of failing? Afraid of being broke? Afraid of being perceived as a loser? The WHY is a spiritual problem and may be addressed through meditation (slow), psychotherapy (slower), or psychedelics (fast but more risk). Until you resolve the WHY of your burnout you’ll likely remain stuck in this cycle.

I can't emphasise this enough, staying interested in doing gym exercise for the sake of fitness alone is not sustainable for most people - and boring even if you can. Exercise is an opportunity to find something physical you enjoy spending your time doing, and this can be as much a mental relief as a physical one. This is similar to how most of us enjoy learning about a technology far more while we have something directly in front of us to apply it to, getting fit and staying fit is really fun when you can apply it.

Remember this does not only mean team sports, there is more to the world than what school PE exposed us to, there will definitely be something out there that interests you. It can also be great for your mental health in general, especially if it involves getting out into nature.

Consider any of the following they all count:

* Hiking in the woods or parks

* Dancing lessons

* Running, Walking, inline skating, long boarding, bicycling, and really anything remotely similar

* martial arts in a dojo / club

* Strength training doing calisthenics at one of those outdoor gym things.

Keep in mind traditional strength training is great[1] for a number of reasons, but it's not the only way to get exercise.

[1]: dare i say superior due to it's muscle preserving and bone density effects? but getting overly picky about optimality can be a source of burnout in of itself.

I've personally found Rock Climbing to be extremely rewarding in highly varied ways - it is a very mental activity, problem solving, but in a physical and personal way that is not in conflict with relief from a cognitive job. It's physically one of the most balanced activities for the body. It can take you to truly awesome places and make you appreciate nature more. It has many sub styles, some with their own interesting mental challenges and techniques. You get a sense of adventure like no other... it's also just inherently damn fun to do, it's not unreasonable to say we have somewhat evolved for climbing - so it makes sense that we find it fun.

It's also a lot more accessible than it used to be. The easiest way to start would be indoor bouldering gyms (these have a fantastic social element too), and then indoor sports climbing gyms... just remember there is much more to be had from it than plastic, the outdoors awaits.

I can't compare the pricing on climbing gyms to regular ones, because I can't remember the last time I went to a "regular" one, I don't think they are unreasonable but that may depend on the country. Here in the UK the number have grown a lot over the last couple decades so that there is healthy competition between them. Another aspect is that once the climbing gym is a supplement and you can go outdoors, it doesn't feel so pricey.

but i started doing manual labor in a creative field, and getting around town using a bike and i'm much better for it.

My biggest bugbear about school PE is the focus on team sports. I know some schools want to build their sports teams, but if there is one goal of PE class it should be ensuring every child finds at least 1 form of exercise they really enjoy.

I’d encourage you to persist in finding something you can get into and stick with. I’ve really got into obstacle course racing events like Tough Mudder and started with the shortest distance - everyone there is helping everyone else through it. Find what works for you.

Can't stress this enough. I've spent the last decade trying to lose weight and failing, always yo-yoing up a little bit higher and losing confidence each time. Consistent diet changes are really freaking hard especially when you're battling other health issue. Aerobic exercise burns a hilariously tiny amount of calories for the effort and eventually it can eat away at motivation.

Setting up a home gym to lift weights and trying to eat healthier rather less has done wonders for my health. ExRx has a lot of information [1] but the gist of it is that a pound of fat burns under 5 calories a day while a pound of lean muscle burns 30 calories a day without exercise and as much as 50 calories a day for up to several days after anaerobic exercise (weight lifting). The maximum grow rate is from half a pound to a pound (for those that won the genetic lottery) of lean muscle a week so in 10 weeks its possible to add 150-300 calories to your basal metabolic rate that requires minimal maintenance compared to on-going dieting. Weight lifting doesn't require that much effort [2] or maintenance, just proper form and equipment, so it's a lot easier to permanently incorporate in a schedule a few times a week than a life long dieting change.

[1] https://exrx.net/FatLoss

[2] https://exrx.net/WeightTraining/Research

Does a treadmill work instead of weight lifting? Curious to know based on your experience.

1. Don't do any addiction. Alcohol, Psychedelics nothing. That's another spiral you won't be able to climb out from.

2. Taking some time off is the easiest way to figure out your l life. You will soon be able to realise your priorities in life. I'd say 2 months is good enough a time. But the most important thing is to not attempt doing any work stuff during the time out period.

> They are generally considered physiologically safe and do not lead to dependence or addiction. [0]

[0] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4813425/

[1] https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/how-to-cure-burnout

[2] https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/dr-randi-raymond

Edit: add references [1] and [2]

This can mean self-medicating if you know what you're doing, but otherwise these days there are professionals qualified to help.

I doubt psychedelics will be used to escape from your issues, but yes - they can make them worse if you're not careful.

"People abusing mushrooms can become dependent by believing that they need the drug to maintain a sense of enlightenment or happiness."

https://www.addictioncenter.com/drugs/hallucinogens/psilocyb...

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29098666/

[0] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/generally

The way this is written means:

They are generally considered physiologically safe.

They do not lead to dependence or addiction.

Also, you did not quote 'generally' in your response (the one with underscores).

> They do not lead to dependence or addiction.

Thanks for making my point.

Edit: Also thanks for the downvote. Being that you then proceeded to _not_ counter me with any real arguments, it also helps to make my point.

Edit 2: (this will be a bit longer)

I think I see what you mean, and I apologise if my writing and understanding was not entirely precise.

You're pointing out that the NCBI link I provided (an actual scientific study) specifically states that they _do not_ cause addiction or dependence, whereas the one you linked from Addiction Center (who seems to sell addiction treatments) with no links to studies says that they _might_ happen.

Despite my now corrected lack of precision, I'm still missing your point.

My point is that psychological addiction is a concern for burnt out people looking for a solution, or people who quit their job and have time to fill. Psychological addiction is different than chemical addiction.

It seems there's an irreconcilable difference in the definitions of addiction that we are using. I think those reading have enough info to view the arguments and make up their minds.

Yes, I understand that.

Do you have any actual evidence that this happens with psychedelics though?

My personal experiences have shown me a very different picture. After a trip I don't want to touch the thing with a long pole for days or weeks, and that's the same I've seen with other people, including some heavy party-goers who are definitely addicted chemically and/or psychologically to many other substances and habits.

Sure, those are anecdotes, but so far I haven't seen evidence to the contrary of them. You haven't provided me with any either, except that Addiction Center article with no science backing. They sell addiction treatment, so it's in their business interest that more addiction exists or is purported to exist. Note that I'm not assuming malice on their side. It's probably more likely that given the lack of evidence either way, they decided to lean towards the more conservative side, which also aligns with their business.

The difference is whether you’re existing in the grip of that fear or thriving from a place of love.

You could try reading something like “The Mastery of Love” by Don Miguel Ruiz to get a taste, but the healing has to come through the body and nervous system. You can’t will your way through this.

Edit: Important note: The right antidepressant can help!

Everyone’s journey is different, but depending on where that fear is coming from, I could imagine drastically different next steps.

Personally, therapy has helped me immensely. A lot of my early anxiety about these things stemmed from severe imposter syndrome, and through the years I’ve gained enough confidence in myself to know that my skills are in demand, and survival is likely in the current market.

But if that fear is due to other things - the health of your employer’s business, etc. then a very different course of action might be required.

Do you have any pointers or experience to expand on that point? How to go about it specifically so that it helps move towards a solution? What about combining it with psychotherapy?

No, they will stab you in the back, no matter how much you think they won't.

> Should I take time off? How much?

Yes, if possible several months or a year so you have time to get fully away from the grind.

> Is there something in my working environment I should try to change?

Probably reduce the volume of work you are doing or do something that you care about more.

> Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out that I should know about?

Yes, it's a constant treadmill of work, and if you aren't ready to never finish a project (all projects I've seen are in constant flux with constant changes) then get out now and find a career where you actually produce a finished product then move on to the next (like furniture building). The idea that software is a thing that is "complete" was a leftover from the 90's and the constant treadmill makes some people (myself included) go nuts.

He recommended an immediate two week vacation to clear my head and told me to plan my next vacation for two weeks 6 months out from my last vacation so that there was a constant light at the end of the tunnel. He was empathetic, and explained losing me would be costly and that he wants to avoid that. Had I not spoken up I would have ended up giving up a great job at a great company for what was mostly inside my own head.

I also went to my doctor and got anti-anxiety medication and that seemed to help. Now that I no longer had physical manifestations of my issues, and that fact that I was getting feedback that I was valued and that my health mattered, it really calmed me down.

If you have decent manager, they want to see you succeed, and they care about your well being. If they don't, bailing from the position is probably in your best interest anyways. Either way, it's an opportunity to see where you stand. Letting go will feel good in the short term, but maybe not so good long term. Doing nothing and hiding it will likely exacerbate the issue. I would say something, I at the very least deserve to be heard. What they do with the details is on them, not you.

But to prevent the worse, just don't tell.

I disagree that this is universally true. I have had at least 2 bosses that I know would help deal with burnout because 1 of them helped me and the other I have seen help others in this same situation. A good boss cares about their employee's health and wants to keep good workers. I agree that your advice is the safe route, but I think if you know for a fact you have one of the good bosses of the world then that approach can lead to better results.

The other part of the advice, namely that your colleagues will backstab you, is even more worrisome. I'd go so far as to say that if you don't have at least some colleagues you can safely tell something like this, then you are in the wrong environment.

At the end of the day, the business has to do the right thing for the organization, even when that's not to the benefit of an individual in the organization.

That said, "the end of the day" is not the beginning. Yes, some people will behave the way you describe. It can be hard to be sure you can trust another human being who you know will be forced to fire you if you can't do the work they hired you to do, at least on a long enough time frame. But not everyone will "stab you in the back", I can promise that.

How dystopian.

When a colleague of mine burned out they talked to their boss and the boss assured them to take as much time as they needed. Then the boss made sure that everybody took as much load off of them as possible so they don't have to worry about projects and other things work related.

In the end my colleague was home for about 12 months, then returned to work, and is still working there, just not as many hours. No problems anywhere, everybody is happy. The boss is happy because they have an experienced employee back and the employees that their boss cares about them.

Not every business is a startup fighting to survive or grow like hell within a year. Some businesses have been around for decades and are in a comfortable place, they can very easily ramp up or down the amount of work they have to accomplish to keep talent happy.

And how can you manage hundreds of engineer?

There it is: address the issue before enough people do that. There will only be lots of people taking a year off if you ran them into the ground, if capacity planning is decent you won't have a significant percentage of the workforce out sick...

How many positions in 2022 allow one to take several months to a year off and still have a job at the end?

> Yes, if possible several months or a year so you have time to get fully away from the grind.

I honestly do not know a single person who has the funds saved up to do this.

Consider that being burned out you don't have any upcoming funds anyway. If you force yourself to earn something, you just burn deeper, get fired or can't find work.

So it's lose-lose, and the best advice is just let it go and focus on your mental health.

Because without it there won't be any money anyway.

Lean on your friends, downsize, shed everything inessential, do what it takes. But don't force yourself to continue as is, it'll only make it worse in the end.

I second the suggestion of several months to a year of time off, but admittedly it's scary to consider getting a job afterwards, since you'll not have the existing job as leverage and some places will question the gap. Depending on the company it may be possible to "boomerang" back in if your leave is under one year without having to do the interview grind again with them.

Unfortunately burnout can take over a year to recover from (if ever 100%), so there's also a reasonable question of whether that extended break is going to be long enough. Maybe OP just needs a month or two, but maybe they'll need a couple years. It's hard to say whether it's better to take a minor break now and then come back until they near the breaking point again, or just power through until they literally can't, saving as much as they can so when they can't they'll have as long as they might need to rest -- which may be longer than if they just stopped now due to the accumulated damage.

This is probably the most detached-from-reality thing I have ever read on HN.

"After a year in software engineering, you should have at least a year's living expenses saved up"? What world are you living in?

Been in software nearly 10 years now. There is no way in any universe that after year 1 I would have had living expenses for a _whole year_ saved up. At a base salary of $30k starting (10 years ago, mind you), with rent at $1.5k/mo, that doesn't leave too much after taxes for savings after existing expenses, let alone being able to save up an entire year's worth of those living expenses on that salary. At the time I started, in my area, $30K/yr was the average, btw.

So yes, your comment was _incredibly_ detached from reality.

Anecdotally, in Utah there are startups as of two years ago offering $200k/yr, but I've got friends there working at unsexy places like the water company or on library software. I think the lowest-earning friend is somewhere around $80k/yr and refuses to consider looking around. 10 years ago out here in the Seattle region, in 2012 I worked at a mostly-two-man startup with a mix of part-time/full-time for $20/hr. If that was full time it'd have been $41k/yr, but it wasn't, so I didn't have a year saved up when we dissolved. Nevertheless I did have enough saved up that with the additional support of some student loans I could mostly wrap up my schooling in 2013 without working even during the off periods. In 2014 I started my first non-startup job and would have been happy with $80k but instead I got $110k, which less than two years later would be a typical starting salary for the one lower "Associate" tier roles used for entry-level incomers with truly no prior experience beyond maybe an internship.

Having previously made $15/hr ($31k/yr if full time, which again it wasn't) during 2010/2011 I do at least understand how hard it can be to save up at that level, so I'm not going to attempt arguing that at $30k/yr and $1500/mo in rent it's somehow straightforward. At that time I split an apartment but circumstances led to me paying the whole thing for a while at around $800/mo, then I moved to a rental house with 3 other people but only paid $550/mo. Rents have only gone up and currently I pay $1750/mo; I can't imagine tolerating $1500/mo at $30k. What was wrong with your area to have such high rents and such low salaries?

Given all that, I'm committed at least to being more careful with my qualifications in the future and I'll try to avoid making such broad claims. Would you accept a weaker claim that "After a year in software engineering in one of the hot areas like coastal cities or Austin, ..."? I don't really want to weaken it that far, since I think salaries have risen enough elsewhere in the last, say, 6 years, that I'd rather make the weaker claim "After a year in software engineering if you've started in the last 6 years...". Is there any n of years you'd agree with, or is it still primarily location-based to you? I also may need to make a qualifier to indicate some sort of funded or longer-established company and not an unfunded garage-style lean startup. I did leave a qualification in my original statement but that hasn't been argued with and I'll keep it (i.e. the possibility of a suspiciously low salary that may need to be addressed first; my friend making around $80k despite working at the same place for many years is near this category, since area salaries around them have gone up quite a bit, however in their case it's not enough on its own to preclude huge savings given the area's living expenses).

Honestly, that would make a lot more sense.

If you even qualified it and said "After a year at today's salaries, as a single adult with no dependents" it would make so much more sense.

> In 2014 I started my first non-startup job and would have been happy with $80k but instead I got $110k

I'm 10 years into the tech field (3 years software automation engineer, 7 years dev) and still haven't even touched your _starting_ salary of 110k. Currently a Lead Software Engineer making just under 100.

Living expenses have gone up significantly with children, though, and with the housing market being what it is.

2. Almost certainly! But remember that work/life balance doesn't just mean leaving work, it means having something you want to do that isn't work.

2a. I know what you mean about boredom, but my brother pointed something out to me at a resort in Cancun, which I was finding absolutely boring: The place is supposed to be that, because it forces you to relax.

3. Yes. I don't have any advice about specifically what, but I would strongly recommend that you just start changing things. This'll both break feelings of stagnation/stasis, and if you're lucky, actually be an improvement. But the important part isn't that you find the right change, it's that things start changing.

4. What we do is fundamentally creative, and fundamentally knowledge-work. Most of us started doing it because we like it, so it's easier for us to over-do it; and over-doing is, AFAIK, more susceptible to burn-out because you're forcing your mind into uncomfortable arrangements. I guess you could think of burnout as RSI for your creativity.

Think about how you get physically strong:

1. Pick up heavy things

2. Put them down

3. Take a nap.

This is true for mental (and emotional!) strength as well.

If you're at severe burnout, which it's definitely sounding like, consider taking a leave of absence (LOA). Time can vary between a couple of weeks to a couple of months, YMMV. If you can afford the LOA, rediscovering things you love is going to help.

Places to start thinking about investing some time are a) physical activity, like weightlifting or hiking; b) learning something new, ideally from a different stack than you've been working on; c) trying to spend more time on hobbies to see if you can find a sense of satisfaction in creating or completing a task, particularly if you can form social bonds at the same time. That said, if you're not good at handling boredom and don't think that having time to do _whatever you want_ is going to be helpful, ease into this step.

If you do stay at your job, try to find different responsibilities. Have a good conversation with your boss (if you can) where you explain that you need to rotate to a new responsibility where you can have a greater sense of mastery and control. Being able to determine your own success and failure can help recover from the hopelessness that goes with burnout.

No matter what, take the time to actively invest in self-care. Not "I'm sitting on the couch" self-care, exercising and eating better self-care. Staying up late learning something you've always wanted to self-care. Painfully changing your life so tomorrow is better self-care.

Good luck, and PM if you want to get to talk. I'm just finishing an LOA for burnout myself, and it's been a trip.

I've burned out twice. Both times I quit. Took a year off between the two. I travelled both times, and then just had my own routine at home. I had no problem finding another job when it was time to come back.

- You can tell your boss. Expect sympathy, but, any plan that works for you is probably one you'll have come up with.

- If you leave, I'd recommend not dictating when it'll end up front. Say three months if people ask, but what you really mean is in three months you'll reassess if you need more time off. No actual deadlines.

- I don't know about you, but for me as a senior eng at a startup, work eats into all hours of day / weekend. Do an 8-4. Not one minute more. No weekend. No slack on your phone. No on call. No evenings.

Be kind to yourself friend. <3 Come up with a routine. I found my days filled up without work as they did with, but taking showers, cooking meals for myself, etc. was important.

I'm feeling less naive and more picky, which also makes me more curious and more motivated. As if a kind of freedom grew. A necessary one.

Best of wishes to you. :)

When you say "burn out" can you describe what it feels like? Is it like depression?

I know it sounds frivolous, but the massage will work like a magic pill on you right now. There's been some research on it – but basically persistent stress makes your body tense, and then even if your mental stress is gone, your body's tenseness keeps you on fight or flight mode. You shouldn't make any decisions in this mode.

A 60 minute massage will untangle this stiffness and put you on the right mindset to make the best next decisions.

About 7 years ago I got a massage and went to a store in a location that usually caused me a ton of stress due to the driving and the parking and how overcrowded the store gets. After the massage I did not experience any stress; 0, none, zip, zilch. My muscles were completely relaxed and had 0 stress in them.

At that moment I realized that stress doesn't cause tightness, but tightness causes stress, for me. Relaxed muscles relaxes my mind.

Seems like you haven't started to make any plans on what to change. I'd wait to talk to your manager/company until you have a better idea of what you need. But then do, maybe they offer some extended time off, maybe they have other mental health resources available. If they do try to make use of them.

Take your time. Don't think you'll be back to where you were any time soon if ever. Maybe your work life will be different from here on out. Maybe you'll have to live with it. Prioritizing companies with good work/life balance is a must.

If you have the means definitively take some time off. The more the better. Or take a part-time job if you still need some income.

No hobbies no problem. Play video games, watch movies, netflix and do exercises every day. It's important to keep your mind and body moving with something that is stress free.

If you don't want to do anything, just sit or lay in bed all day. Look for a psychologist. This is not normal, you need treatment and it's available, is easy and it works. It just takes some time to find the right med. Don't let yourself be depressed.

When you are interested again try to create a hobby project, even if it doesn't generate any income, learn a new framework or language, or whatever technical that sparks interest in you. As you build interest again in work stuff you'll miss work.

No there're not your family. You need to talk with a professional and take decision together.

> Should I take time off? How much? Or should I try to work reduced hours?

It's impossible to say. Everyone is different. Some need to work part time, others a month off and others 2y. When I did my burn out at first it's 4 months, after 6 and at the end it's a year. Again decision with a professional. Evaluation every month at first.

Depend also your country/insurance. For me it's easy because I live in EU, so my salary was paid at 80% while i was taking care of myself for a 1y.

> If I continue working, is there something in my working environment I should try to change? Think of senior engineer in a typical DevOps-y SaaS startup.

Again need a professional and long conversations. May be it's the environement or the job itself.

> Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out that I should know about? I feel like this isn't exactly rare.

Because it's always the same. Managers think when we add or remove features, it's just lego. You re-assign 1 ticket 3 others come.

Burnout is real and really, really bad. It is a lot of suffering. Don’t be snarky to people about worst experiences of their lives.

"Nothing" is not a vacation. Mental health problem is a bitch. In this whole 1y, for 4 months I was in a bad place.

    1. Remove yourself from the environment is causing the burnout.
    2. Find fulfilling activities that do not come from your employment in the IT industry.

That's the burnout speaking. I suspect you might feel the same way even if the pandemic was completely over. Getting yourself on the path to recovery will help with this, and you'll be amazed at all the hobbies you can do (even in a pandemic) that sound interesting and worthwhile.

Best of luck, I hope you're able to get into a situation that allow you to recover and find some satisfaction in your current career in the future.

Your lack of hobbies is probably directly related to this. I'm not sure how many hours you're working but have they led you to trim your free time?

Don't let yourself work overtime, and try to find something you love to do instead of work. Reading, exercising, anything. Commit to loving yourself everyday.

If you can, take some vacation when your comfortable.

If you don't believe that, or thing that sounds petty or stupid, ask yourself why.

Do you feel like you need the job to survive financially? Work on that. Go read about FIRE. Look at how much money you spend and make. Pay off debt. Build a cushion. Spend less. Figure out how to get out of that hole until you can look at your paycheck in one hand and the pile of bullshit from your job in the other, and say "it's just a job."

Do you feel like you'd never find another job? Start career development. Take classes. Get certificates. Learn new skills. Tell your boss you need time at work for personal development to keep relevant and contribute at your company. Get them to pay for it. Get yourself to the point where if you had to walk, you have three other places begging to take you. You can say it's just a job if there are many more out there waiting for you.

Lack of sleep, depression, exhaustion, stress, and other physical and mental issues are a big problem, and those need to be addressed. Eat right, sleep enough, take care of yourself, see a doctor, see a therapist. Lots of good advice on this thread, and some of it may work, some of it may not. But as long as your life is defined by your job, you'll come back and the same thing will happen again. It's just a job. Tell yourself that until you believe it.

It's surprising how much you can do at zero (or almost zero) cost. I never felt like the clock was counting down to get well again which was enormously beneficial psychologically.

Exercise, get outside once a day, get a daily routine in place, sleep better

I have a contrarian opinion (that I have also posted here several times) that burnout is not merely a symptom of overwork but actually a symptom of missed behavioural prediction error: Your brain has taught itself that effort => failure, and so the motivation to put more effort into things is decreased.

The first step to understanding and overcoming it is a root cause analysis -- identify when you started putting in extra effort, what you thought you'd get out of it, and what you thought you'd get out of it that you didn't get. It might have been a promotion, a pay raise, a bonus, or social validation. Or, if there was a negative reinforcement that succeeded your valiant efforts (e.g. people shitting on your open-source project).

If you believe my thesis, then possibly the absolute worst thing you can do is to go on vacation right now (this is rewarding the cycle of not putting in effort). Rather, plan a vacation for yourself, say 3 months from now, (and if you want to be brutally effective, plan to cancel or bump the time of your vacation if you don't recover from burnout by then).

What you want to do from now till then is to build back up your work motivation. Work on a ton of tiny tasks that are almost certainly going to succeed, like that refactoring that you've put off, or writing tests. These are really good because they will give you primary stimulus (making those red dots go green) that provide you a pop of dopamine, rewarding you for the small amounts of work that you've done. Also, do small things, like "cook a meal" which take effort, and celebrate yourself for putting the effort into things, and meals are great because they are their own reward (unless you horribly mess it up).

I haven't generally burnt out (I have burnt out on individual projects) for more than about 2 weeks in a decade or so since I adopted this strategy.

As far as should you tell your boss and/or team: my highly sophisticated algorithm for this is, if you were the boss, would you want to be notified? It's not smart to tell the team: it would percolate to the boss in a distorted form anyway, but also it's up to your boss to deal with the issue properly.

I have a todo list of about 6 million things to do before I die so I can't empathize very well with the boredom thing. My instinct though is that it's very good for you to be challenging yourself somehow. If not with a hobby, then maybe something like sports/self defense/meditation would do the trick.

I think you're going through something bigger than it may seem at the moment. Good luck on your journey.

This stands out to me. If I thought of my work as "typical", I'd ask myself whether what I'm doing is worth my time. Whether it's fulfilling and has purpose. Whether I'm having an impact on the work and whether the work has an impact on whatever problem is being solved. That on its own is enough to cause me feeling burnt out, especially over a multi-month period of time.

This was a huge issue for me over the last year. It has made a huge impact to my work life to finally have activities outside of work I enjoy doing again.

[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nm1TxQj9IsQ

[2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXvDEmo6uS4

TL;DW:

1. As soon as you wake up each morning, expose yourself to 5-10 minutes of the sun, or the brightest light you can find (ideally above 10000 lux, going outside is much more effective than a lamp or window).

2. At the end of the day, reduce light, especially blue light. Ideally, also go out during sunset, to give your body a cue that the day is ending.

3. Mindfully time when to eat and exercise (details did not fit in the 1.3h video). In evenings, disconnect or meditate to relax.

4. Consider the drugs you take and their effects on the circadian rhythm. Magnesium threonate 300mg makes you sleepy.

The answer to the next question will depend upon how the conversation with your boss goes. You might want to completely disconnect and quit. You might want to work 1-2 days/week, supporting your team for questions but moving off of deadline-critical parts. You might want to shift into a different role entirely; oftentimes doing something different can cure burnout. Some or all of these options might be available to you depending on what your boss says, or he may suggest something entirely different.

For the last two questions - I've heard that burnout is basically the result of loving something or someone for a prolonged period of time without them loving you back. Code will never love you back, which is one reason why tech and other knowledge workers are particularly at risk for burnout. But it happens with politicians, managers, and romantic relationships as well. It sounds like coding is a major part of your life; as hard as it may be, you may want to cultivate other things you love (perhaps including hobbies, or people) and view your work with more professional detachment. Yes, this probably means you'll be less effective at it, but it's also more sustainable.

For example, if taking a break would create even more stress (financial stress, boredom stress, etc), don't do it.

But more importantly, do what your doctor says, up to and including ignoring all advice here!

- Summer came. - I started therapy and joined a group that helped me understand my behaviour of perfectionism etc. Most helpful 12 week programme.

- I played video games to offload my brain, as I couldn't focus or read text

- I started painting also - was awful at school hated drawing etc, but turned out together with video games it was the only thing that could put off that load on my brain.

- I basically took a stance to never go back again to IT. It didn't work out though but I'm in a more aware situation and don't put too much load on myself. Another thing is that I realised it's just not for me to code, to keep worrying about systems, wondering what might break etc. I'm really more of a practical guy.

- So right now I'm trying to shift my focus where I can recognize my strengths first. Being at a desk is not really that, and that's hard to realize though.

Burnout is really...your overheated engine in the car. You can't use it. At least that's how it was for me.

I could write a lot more but DM if you need anything.

Depending on symptoms the program can be longer.

After confirming your benefits and speaking with healthcare professional, talk to HR before your manager. Your manager may not know all the benefits available or try to hide them from you.

Take as long as you need to recover. You may not have hobbies but sometimes vegging out in front TV for a few days is all you need to recover.

Also forget about all the healthy stuff like exercise, meditation, etc. Just sleep as long as you can. Burning out means your body is under maximum stress. You don't want to add to your plate. Remove things from it.

Relaxing experiences maybe okay like massages, bathes, a slow walk.

Finally, ancedata, I know someone who was getting burned out. They didn't show up for work for a week. When they got back, their boss was furious but they said they were burned out. HR got involved. Boss got in trouble for creating unhealthy work environment. Person was told to take more time off and see a therapist. This was at a major US company.

I'd start by seeing a therapist.

It's nice to have someone to speak with about your issues that can help provide guidance.

I spent better part of a decade working every day I was awake. Started seeing a therapist after working with some truly horrible people who now face serious repercussions for their actions.

Recently, I splurged on some retro game stuff. I spent years ignoring retro gaming. I thought these were relics for immature man children who lived in their parents basement. My wife also hates the look so I had spent years not only turning a blind eye toward them but also putting what I did own since childhood into storage for when we started a family. Once I went down the rabbit hole of some retro games I don't think I'll be looking back. I found that not only are they fun to play but I have a passion for restoring them. I started by re-learning how to repair integrated circuits (I hadn't used a soldering iron in 20 years before this). Now I plan to save as many as I can.

All I'm saying, start by talking to someone who will listen and you can feel comfortable talking with. A therapist was good for me because you pay them to be your confidant. Mental health is like any other part of your body you care for.

I would however absolutely not let any co-workers or representatives of your employer know what you are going through. There is a terrible stigma around mental health and it will be perceived as a disability/weakness by some in a manner that could impact your livelihood.

It really depends. If your boss is generally a good person he'll be glad to know and try to help you. If he's a shitty person he might use it against you or think less of you. You should know or at least be able to guess which way he should be leaning. Not sure I'd tell the team though, this should be between you and your boss for now, it shouldn't become the company's gossip.

> I'm hesitant because I don't have many hobbies (if any) and in the middle of the pandemic there isn't much to do anyway.

To me that is telling something. It's quite possible you also have a mild depression going on (and could be that the burnout is exacerbated by it). What I mean is it might be that things aren't as you'd like them to be in other areas of life, which can eventually hurt your job performance since your mental well being isn't great. Keep getting the support you need, be willing to make some changes. Rooting for you.

Take the time you need to think about what's best, and delay irreversible decisions until you are in a good place to make them.

Do whatever you need to get into a good mental space so you can think about what's the best course of action for you.

For me I think a big part of my problem was my lack of other hobbies that weren't IT-related.

Now I work part-time and try to spend time working on non-IT stuff as well, I've gotten into a bunch of different things in the years since then: Philosophy, strength training, latin, calligraphy, partner dancing. You don't have to do these things, but what they have in common is that they aren't keyboard-y things.

so far so good. employee came back after being able to finally catch up on life, we hit reset as a team and we're off and away.

this doesn't help prevent future burnout specifically but it was an initial step that showcased that we cared more about our employees' health than the company.

Find something to do in your spare time that interests you, something unrelated to your work.

Get out of the house, change your scenery. I find that leaving town, even just for a day, helps a lot. Go camping over night, get off the grid and disconnect. Getting fresh air and a little exercise goes a long way.

Don't discount the value of being bored, you might need to get bored before you figure out what to do with yourself.

Eventually, I had to go to my doctor and deal with it. They gave me a few different sleep drugs to try, and I found one that worked extremely well at not forcing me to sleep like a sedative, but helping me fall asleep and to stay asleep. Using the sleep meds and strictly enforcing my work hours plus a 2 week vacation was all that saved me (at this point I didn't care anymore, I simply got done what I could in 8hrs and the rest could fuck off).

It took about a month of 8hrs minimum per night of good quality sleep, but man did it make a big difference. After that everything mostly fell back into place. I've since kept the more strict work hours and have taken on a role that actually has me learning new things vs. grinding out mass amounts of tedious but important work. I do work too much still, but I cap it ~ 50hrs a week and take as much flexibility as I can with it. No meetings until 10am and I was online until 8pm the night before? Cool, I'll be in at 10 and will hit the gym before work so I have more family time after work. No more bending backwards to get everything done.

Both my primary car physician and myself aren't fans of sleeping meds either, but I absolutely needed something to help me sleep at the time.

They absolutely are for short term use. I haven't needed the meds again since, but I have a prescription filled in case I experience insomnia again. If I do, I'll likely do a sleep study as well to rule out any other issues.

I started to broaden my reading topics: psycology and neuroscience to understand my behavior; philosophy to improve my thinking; and physics to make my environment more relative. Besides, I engaged into long term therapy.

I have learnt to understand myself better, to lower my ambitions, and most of all, to prioritize my family. Besides, I decided not to make my free time productive: just reading, going to cinema, and taking walks out. That has reduced my anxiety and I have hope that soon I could be a more sustainable professional with more settled ambitions. I am thankful I did not lose my job and my family.

Everyone has different needs. I just wanted to share my experience

What I did was quit for a year (I understand not everyone has the means). I told my boss I wanted to travel and I found it hard to balance it with work because my schedule is so unpredictable. He asked if I wanted a shorter sabbatical, and I said no because I had plans to places I wanted to travel throughout the year. I wanted to leave without burning bridges and we were slightly in a busy time, I said my quit date was flexible to whenever we get past the busy time.

I ended up splitting my year off at home and traveling. I previously backpacked parts of Asia for a month and found that going to country to country every few days to be overwhelming. So this time I would go some place on my bucket list and then come back to the US (such as spend a month driving around New Zealand and hiking for two weeks in Scotland). Again, I realize not everyone can do this, but to the extent you can/want to, think of things to knock off your bucket list.

After a year, my boss came back to me to ask if I was interested in coming back, which I did. I felt the year off helped cleared my head. Yes, you will get bored, but you will get some clarity. And since I have come back, I have been better of setting my schedule (it also helps that the office has expanded and I am no longer filling in every spot).

That said, if your diagnosis is accurate and you have serious occupational burnout, then I'd seriously consider switching careers to something radically different from what you're doing now -- and the sooner the better.

The longer you wait, the less realistic switching careers will be, and then you might be forced to keep working at a job you hate, which can drive some to suicide or severe mental breakdown.

Psychedelic therapy might help, but I wouldn't look at it as a way to become chipper and go cheerily back to work but as a way to have a deep, hard look at your life and reconnect with what truly matters (which might not be work-related at all).

Ultimately, you have to somehow reconnect with the strength and sense of meaning within you, because at the end of it all no one else can fix your life... but having a strong support network can help. Don't go it alone, and reconnect as much as possible with those who you care about and who care about you. But at the same time, friends and family are not trained professionals, and there's only so much they can do, so it's important to find a therapist you respect, like, trust, and can open up to.

Good luck, and I hope this disease doesn't swallow you up like it has so many of us.

This depends on how your relationship with your boss is and how they are. I once encountered the start of burn out and told my boss, and he said to go do something fun. So I played video games while he covered for me and let me know if I was needed for a meeting. It was great and I skirted burn out.

- Should I take time off? How much? Or should I try to work reduced hours?

I have taken up backpacking and have loved taking a day off or two to go out into the woods. I really love just disconnecting from the world.

- If I continue working, is there something in my working environment I should try to change?

Maybe try different text editors? I don't know if doing that would bring more stress as you have to learn new stuff. But, maybe you want to learn it, its up to you.

- Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out that I should know about?

Burnout as I have been told and experienced is normal, but its usually a sign that something is off like a lot more work has been thrown at you or your team, or you feel like your contributions are not getting the attention you want. Or, you just want to not work because your brain is tired of always working.

As for boredom and not liking it, I have found that it pays to do nothing some times and just daydream at home, doing absolutely nothing. It helps my brain rest and clear out all its stressors.

Also keep in mind this advice is what works for me, but it may work for you. Take it with a grain of salt.

Yes and No. Yes if you believe your boss will be supportive to help you find a work-life balance. No if you don't think so and just try to work less to recover.

- Should I take time off? How much? Or should I try to work reduced hours? I'm hesitant because I don't have many hobbies (if any) and in the middle of the pandemic there isn't much to do anyway. I don't think running out of things to do would be any better for my health than continuing as-is. I've been there before and I don't handle boredom well.

Both? Use your time to recover and work reduced hours. Find new hobbies and get bored because that way you will be more creative and pursue passion projects. Maybe you're burned out because you don't have a hobby outside of work. Embrace being bored until creativity strikes for your next thing.

- If I continue working, is there something in my working environment I should try to change? Think of senior engineer in a typical DevOps-y SaaS startup.

Burnout in my experience comes from not having something better to do than work. Find hobbies, make friends, play games, read books, etc. It can also manifest in not being able to accomplish certain things at work, so talk to people and find ways to unblock yourself.

- Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out that I should know about? I feel like this isn't exactly rare.

Not really. Maybe you just have been working too much and you're at the verge of a breakdown. Find things that make you happy. Right now, that's probably not a computer.

In the past when I've experienced burnout, I didn't get over it by powering through it. Taking time off without filling the void with something meaningful also wasn't the answer for me. I wanted to work and to stay busy, but I needed to find a problem that I could latch on to and be truly interested in. Since I enjoy learning, trying new patterns and new tools was usually enough for me. There was one past episode of burnout where I simply had to find a new company because nothing that company did was exciting to me anymore.

Good luck.

I have family telling me to "just sleep more" as if i wouldn't do that if it was in my control.

I'm sorry about your situation but I believe most people can sleep 10+ hours if they want, under the right conditions.

Unfortunately, I don't know if a translation to English exists.

[1]: https://ru.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D0%91%D0%B5%D0%BB%D0%BE%D0%B5...

If you don't have good health, everything else is useless - a big house is no benefit when you lie down in bed all day.

So your health should be above everything else - try to build a healthy lifestyle, then you can do the next steps.

I had a similar mindset, I've been very cautious with regards to covid and haven't taken a real vacation since 2019. Since I banked a lot of PTO, I ended up taking every Friday off from September until January. I still have feeling of burnout, but it definitely helped to lessen it.

It can feel like a half-meausure, but it may be one that doesn't feel as extreme for you or you boss/job which may be helpful.

Second, take some time off. Burnout can sometimes be hard to shake off when you are still at work. You may be scared of having so much time on your hands, but you can always go back to work :)

Think about starting therapy. Often burn outs are not because of actual external pressure, but because of the internal pressure we put on ourselves because we put on ourselves. If the root cause is not solved, there is so point in going back to work because it will happen again.

While taking time off isn't a bad idea, you may find you immediately burn out again on returning to work. The goal should be figuring out how to work sustainably. I'm sure I'll echo a lot of other voices here, but here is some practical advice from a manager and someone who's recovered from burnout:

First, if you've been working more than forty hours a week, scale it back. Let your manager know you've been having health issues and will be trying out lifestyle adjustments which may mean your velocity could drop as you cut back to a more sustainable schedule. This is important, since your velocity is going to drop no matter what and you want to get ahead of that with your manager. If anyone wants more detail and you don't feel comfortable saying no, focus on the symptoms and not the cause. Sharing that you're burnt out can inadvertantly come out as blame.

Second, when you aren't working, don't use computers or do anything remotely similar to your work routine for at least a couple weeks. You may not know what to do with yourself at first. Exercise, hiking, or a non-tech side project are things to consider. The important thing is to find something to think about that isn't work.

Finally, SLEEP! This will likely be the hardest part, as your burnout related symptoms are ultimately caused by poor sleep. The other steps you're taking are in service of making this step easier. Allocate at least 9 hours of time for sleep every night. Melatonin can help in the short term if you find it difficult to sleep early enough, but keep in mind you'll probably have lots of dreams and wake up groggy until you've adjusted.

Burn out is common in tech because most of us love what we do. However, love of what we do plus stress can mean an inability to disengage, which results in poor sleep. Poor sleep creates a general feelings of unwellness and inability to think clearly. This will happen to the best of us from time to time. However, if you prioritize your recovery, you'll bounce back pretty fast.

Good luck to you!

1. https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3874875 is the HN discussion for this post (the original HN link is broken) https://www.asc.ohio-state.edu/kilcup.1/262/feynman.html

Mental Health

_____

Get on an anti-anxiety medication if you can / want to. They can be really helpful to take the edge off for a while until you return to normal.

My therapist is the one I info-dump and bitch about work to. I don't have any particularly deep psychological trauma. I just want to pay someone to complain about work to, so they can give me feedback and things to try. It isn't fair to your friends and family to constantly be absorbing your pain.

I learned this the hard way after losing friends because I was "too negative and whiny."

Hobbies

_____

I read a book called "atomic habits" and I liked it a lot.

Basically, when I have a hobby, I track TIME, not "goals." Goals are too nebulous. Time is something I can keep track of easily and more time === more good at hobby. ( Kind-of. It is at least a decent metric to track. )

I picked up guitar, beer making, smoking meat, running, game development, all during the pandemic. I hear you! I just jumped around until I found something that stuck. Don't give up on finding a hobby! But don't stick with you you aren't enjoying.

Work

____

I wouldn't tell your work you are "burned out." People... can suck. And do you really need a bunch of opinions and attention around how stressed out and tired of the job you are? No, not really.

Maybe reach out to individuals privately if you want some support but also: see section 1: Your friends/coworkers are not your therapist.

As for specific reasons... for me it is other people. The work is fine, but dealing with personalities, and boredom, and stress... it gets exhausting.

Try to identify the people who are causing you the most stress and try to interact with them as little as possible. Keep a journal. If they are being outright abusive, write it down in the journal, and eventually you will have something you can present to justify your request to be distanced from them.

If you can exercise or do other physical activities like going for a walk. Disconnect completely after work, get a feature phone. A lot of people having burnouts due to being over connected and even more so with remote work.

Walk really slow and try to be in the actual moment.

Do things you’ve been putting off for ever due to feeling burned out. That book that’s been sitting on the shelf for a year, that lego set or doodling book or the guitar you swore you were going to learn.

See people for a coffee, drink or other activity.

Avoiding burnout is often about learning the painful lessons of separating your professional life from your actual life and it’s not an easy task.

We tend to forget to stop and smell the roses.

Learn to handle boredom well. It’s a critical life skill that only becomes more important as you age. Better to learn that skill now, rather than deal with crippling depression in the face of enforced boredom from health events and the like.

Develop a few hobbies. Never in the history of human experience has it been easier to pick up a hobby. You may want to consider knitting vintage Volvos out of steel wool, but there are other directions to explore as well.

Defining yourself as someone who “can’t allow themselves to relax at the risk of coming down with a bad case of boredom” might be at the root of some of your feelings right now.

Second, I've taken several extended breaks and they have helped. That was before pandemic. I found you need to take long enough where you start wanting to do work again. That is the sign burn out is over. How long that takes can really vary. Sometimes it's been 3 weeks, once it took 3 months, and another time it almost 6 months before I was ready to work again.

Some responses to your questions:

> If I continue working, is there something in my working environment I should try to change? Think of senior engineer in a typical DevOps-y SaaS startup.

Sometimes the key is to stop trying to change the things you cannot. Work is work, divorce yourself from some aspects of it and you will be freeing yourself from unnecessary stress of things you will not be able to change.

> Should I take time off? How much?

I'd say take a long weekend. See how much recovery that gives you. Maybe it'll give you a gauge of how long you will really need. My gut says at least 2 weeks.

> Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out that I should know about? I feel like this isn't exactly rare.

This is a golden question. WTH do we all burn out so much?

Your bosses reaction should be acknowledgement that your personal health takes priority over everything else because this is an obvious fact. Anything less is not acceptable. (Source: I am a boss).

The options you will receive depend on the company. Time off or part time is a good idea.

You don't need a plan to do 'something that's not work'. Don't worry about that part. Take the time off first and figure out the rest later. It might be a good time to visit friends/family as part of a holiday. Things are starting to open back up.

If the boss is a good boss, they will work with you and try to help. If your boss is not, things could get a bit more complicated.

In other words, be prepared for a boss that makes this your problem. If they do, that's a sign that you should probably be looking elsewhere anyway. That might also be a clue about where the burnout is coming from.

But bottom line, think through what your next steps look like if

a) Your boss is understanding, and wants to help (what do you want from them? how might they help? etc.)

b) Your boss is dismissive, or doesn't have the ability to help (will you look for another job that is less stressful, or focus on saving enough for a sabbatical, or other?)

If you were a senior engineer you have enough money to recover. If you don't then you are in a rough spot. If you spent it whoops sell some toys to get by. If you were not paid enough to have money for this time its important to also understand that you were used and abused and probably have PTSD not only burn out.

I am European, this might matter.

Also, in general it was very instructive for me to read carefully the Wikipedia page for occupational burnout.

Really look at your diet. I went through a period where I was finding it harder and harder to stay focused at work, and I attributed it to burnout. Then I started taking fish oil capsules for vitamin D and the problem magically went away.

I;m not saying that will work for you, but I am saying diet makes a HUGE difference to mood, ability to concentrate and general mental well-being. Sometimes you are just deficient in some essential nutrient.

But those are the big three. Sleep, diet and exercise.

I had accumulated (and untouched) vacation time, so I wrapped up anything critical, drove to SFO, got on a plane to Mexico, and stayed for two weeks. I did not bring my laptop. I did nothing but swim, go to the beach, read (physical) novels and have nice meals at restaurants.

Exercise and sunshine pulled me out of a truly devastating spiral; it may not work in the same way for you, but could it hurt?

Good luck: I really feel for you.

wouldn't you have to go back to that and end up in the same situation again?

Assuming you have some sort of health, start walking (or some other exercise).

The pandemic and related things put a magnifying glass up against all the bits that tend to break over time. Everyone is suffering, you're probably lucky-ish that you can easily do something about it (I'm stereotyping here from being in a tech job rather than say hospitality or service industry).

You need to be real with yourself. Is my job killing me?

If your job is the source of your stress, you need to leave. Find another workplace or job that doesn't suck.

Leaving a toxic workplace is the best decision you'll ever make.

No, seriously, I don't have any better advice.

P.S. The person saying sleep more is right. It will help you recover (partially) from the havoc the energy drinks wreak on your body.

1. Sleep is when your brain shifts processing power from consciousness/etc to maintenance. Like defragging a disk drive. When I can't sleep, I'll just try to focus on my body with this in mind, and it kinda works like sleep, and kinda helps me get closer to sleep.

2. If you're having trouble falling asleep, gently wrap the fingers of your dominant hand around the opposite thumb (you're just holding it). Do that for an estimated (do NOT count, or set a timer, or anything that requires focus) two minutes, then move to the next finger. It's fricking magic.

When I can't sleep and do these things, even if I don't wake up rested, I don't wake up still tired, either.

• Exercise or walk for an hour during the day

• Turn of electronics an hour before bed and do something calm, e.g. read a book (often not necessary, but if you want surefire)

• Have a consistent sleep schedule - wake up at same time at least 6 days a week

• Complete dark - blackout curtains or t-shirt over face

• Complete quite - ear plugs. A lot of people complain about them, but they work great if you just can't sleep.

• Don't move - usually best if you sleep on back

• Most "techniques - counting breath, repeating a phrase, etc don't work, just don't think about anything important

• On the note of my (somewhat sarcastic) point about energy drinks - don't have those or any coffee/sugar at least 16 hours before you sleep

As long and convoluted as that list seems, to me it's just essential to reliably sleep every time. I use it and it works.

Do you have a family ?

Let's assume your answers are a lot and no.

Just stop. I quit a horrible job in my youth without knowing if I'd make rent next month.

It was worth it,but only because I didn't have any dependents. With a family this is insanely reckless.

This is why fewer of us are having families. There's something in the back of our minds telling us that we're not safe.

Should probably listen to the aforementioned healthcare professionals instead of the contradictory advice you're getting here though.

https://icd.who.int/browse11/l-m/en#/http://id.who.int/icd/e...

For comparison depression is "depressed mood or diminished interest in activities occurring most of the day, nearly every day during a period lasting at least two weeks accompanied by other symptoms such as difficulty concentrating, feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt, hopelessness, recurrent thoughts of death or suicide, changes in appetite or sleep, psychomotor agitation or retardation, and reduced energy or fatigue."

https://icd.who.int/browse11/l-m/en#/http%3a%2f%2fid.who.int...

That's a description of most of my career. However, as long as they keep paying me well, it doesn't matter that much if I'm burned out or not - the money keeps coming in either way, and stash grows every month. I've never been fired either, so it looks like my performance while burned out is still enough to meet expectations.

And go where, do what, in the middle of this fucking pandemic paranoia?

Work is your best bet, if you have it.

Do you take a reputable multi-vitamin?

Do you drink enough water?

You can't build without raw materials.

TL;DR - Occupational Burnout is a result of the body's inability to respond to cortisol (stress hormone) in the work environment. Sleep, vacationing & working out are a prerequisite, but insufficient to correct. The article instead recommends that people should address major contributing factors that show up most commonly:

1. workload

2. autonomy

3. fairness

4. reward: comp + recognition

5. workplace community

6. purpose: values + meaning

^ In my case, I took a hard look at each one and have been making sure I focus on addressing those that seem to be most demotivating to me. Creating a physical work environment and reading about the behavioral science of habbit forming has also been great support.

Best of luck in getting through it. You're not alone!

I absolutely believe there is a way for you to get through this. Don't be discouraged!

The first thing you must do is to kill the negative thought train. Don't panic, don't assume your career is over, that you have no hope, that it's going to get worse, that people are going to find out, that you'll get fired, etc.. Whatever you're fearful about as a result of realizing you're burnt out, try to set it aside for now because you don't need any more stress or worry. It sounds like you have time to think about what to do, so take that time, and don't put yourself under any pressure. Accept the state you're in. It's ok. This happens to many, many people, and you're not the only one. Moreover, your world doesn't sound like it's about to end. Relax about it, as much as you can.

I would echo what some others have said here about telling your boss/team: don't. What I think you need to do is look at what your day-to-day job is like, and see if there's anything you want to change. Is there anything that's really dragging you down? Do certain tasks or projects drive you crazy or make you feel depressed? Are you unhappy with your role in general? Do you hate your office and need to move? Is WFH making you unhappy, and you need to be back in a real office? Try to ponder it all, see if there's something you could change that would give you some quality of life improvement. When you think you have something, take that to your boss, and see what they can do about it. Don't engage in self-enfeeblement when you have that talk. You're entitled to set boundaries for yourself and ask for a change without having to divulge anything about your personal state of mind. Just say plainly that you're not feeling happy in your current role, and you'd like to give something else a try (i.e., whatever alternative you're going to present). Ask if that's possible now or at some point soon. If not, ask if there's something else available right now that they could offer you because you feel like you really need a change. Consider the options, but only choose one if it appeals to you, not just because you think need to choose one.

If it's a hard no from the boss or if there are no good options, then ok, no problem. Consider your next options. A job is a job. If things aren't so bad where you're at, then maybe it's worth staying. Ask yourself if perhaps you are too emotionally invested in having a "great career". If so, work on detaching emotionally. Show up each day when you have to, and leave when you can. It's ok to do a good job, and do it for the pay check. You don't have to accomplish anything great. You don't have to break your back for your employer. If you stay where you're at, look at ways that you can change little things to give yourself some feeling of agency and autonomy. For me, I had schedule flexibility, so I engaged in a daily act of rebellion where I would sleep in, show up in time for the daily stand-up, then do what I could until I felt like I was done for the day, and then I went home. If you don't want to stay where you're at, then take time to think about what you want to do next.

I can recommend seeking professional help. A good therapist is a very valuable disinterested third-party who can help you think everything through. Unless your situation is in dire straits, the best way forward is to make small but well-considered steps that will help create emotional and psychological space for yourself to heal. Oftentimes, what we think is the one problem causing us to burn out isn't actually the only problem contributing to the situation. A therapist can give you perspective on that. Perhaps anti-depressants might be a help for you, but a therapist can help you figure that out too. Don't sign up for the drugs straight away unless it is clearly needed.

I can also recommend walking, every day if you can, for as long as you're able or it remains enjoyable for you. Wooded areas and around lakes are great to walk around, but anywhere will do. It will help you relax and mull things over. It really will. Listen to music if you like, but also try it without. Stop and sit along the way. Take in the sky, the birds, the trees, the landscape. Just enjoy being there, and the beauty of nature. Think about whatever's on your mind, but don't force yourself to think of a solution. Let your mind wander. Space out. Relax.

Over time, you will be able to figure out what you need to change. It took me a couple of years, to be honest, but that's fine. It's not a race. The building (i.e., my life) wasn't burning, so I just focussed on taking my time because I didn't want to change too much too soon and end up back in the same hole down at some point down the road. I took care to sleep well (but not too much), walk regularly, and try do things I enjoyed (or used to enjoy). No pressure. If I didn't feel like doing anything intellectual on a particular day, I didn't. I got a lot of mileage out of housework, cooking, and walking on those days.

I believe you can figure this out. Hang in there, my friend!

I’ve been a Devops engineer for almost 7 years now. I genuinely love my profession and I am very passionate for what I do.

The burn out came a couple of years ago: I worked in a project with tons of technical debt. The company had a plan of moving the project into a different cloud. Their plan was “lift and shift” but I insisted on the fact that this was a perfect opportunity for doing things well. I presented my plan and they allowed me so I commited to refactor it from top to bottom. I worked for many more hours than agreed by contract and even weekends. Those months feelt like one giant day of work. I did all that not because I wanted to gain more money or respect. I did it because I take the “doing things right if I have the knowledge” as some kind of moral obligation.

It was a huge success. Everyone in the team and in the company was impressed and happy with the results and they saw the benefit. But, despite all the good outcome, I started to feel that something was not right on me. I felt intellectually and even physically exhausted. My mind was cloudy all the time. I started to have insomnia. I struggled to focus and I developed a very low tolerance to stress reacting to it with anxiety and frustration. I lost my good memorisation capacity. I went down into a hole where everything in my life started to be blurry: my technical knowledge, my personal decisions, my plans for the future etc. I felt insecure. I hated myself for not being able to cope with stuff anymore and I hid it for not looking “weak” in front of coworkers, family and friends.

My advice from the lessons learned is:

1 - Communicate your status to your superiors (and she/he will give you advice on how to comunicate it to your team), family and friends. Be open, realistic and clear. What you are feeling is normal so there’s no reason for dramas from anybody.

2 - Be honest with yourself.

3 - Have mercy for yourself.

4 - Accept your limitations. This doesn’t mean you accept you’re weak. This means you are potentially taking the first step to develop a strategy to overcome those limitations.

5 - Break the pattern by moving to a different project/department or even move into a different company.

6 - Take at least a minimum of one month of time off and allow yourself to be plain lazy. Forget about your company and duties during that time off. Enjoy yourself even if that implies to be for 5 hours in a row watching garbage on Netflix eating buckets of popcorn.

7 - Find a hobby: I’ve done from lockpicking, to learn an instrument, to electronics (arduino stuff), to videogames, sport, yoga, reading novels etc. Is gonna be good in the middle/long run not only for resting your mind but also for improving as a computer engineer even if the hobby is not directly related.

And that’s it. I hope you find it useful.

When I burned out, I read quite a bit on burnout research and a very interesting finding is the conclusion that burnout it isn’t necessarily a result of overwork. It can be, sure. But more often it’s the result of a mismatch between effort and reward, or misalignment in the value or meaning of your work.

Christina Maslach, a seminal researcher, co-developed a detailed survey known as the Maslach Burnout Inventory to measure burnout. Her theory is that any one of the following six problems can empty us: working too much; working in an unjust environment; working with little social support; working with little agency or control; working in the service of values different than our own; working for insufficient reward (whether the currency is money, prestige, or positive feedback).

I suggest googling and taking the Maslach Burnout Inventory to get a sense of which of these 6 areas is most affecting your sense of burnout to help guide you on what you should do next.

> Should I take time off? Should I tell my boss and/or team

I believe these questions are directed at what actions you can take to address the burnout in your current work environment.

Burnout can present as any combination of three distinct symptoms: exhaustion (a depletion of mental or physical resources), cynical detachment (a depletion of social connectedness), and a reduced sense of efficacy (a depletion of value for oneself).

The specific actions you should take depends on which combination of symptoms you have, but researchers generally think agency is the most restorative path to heal burnout. There are a lot of suggestions in this thread toward the self-care path and while self-care is important, it may not be as healing to the root cause of burnout if it doesn’t help you feel like you are in control of your work life. If I can throw in my two cents, I’d recommend activities that help you feel empowered and in control. That’s not terribly actionable advice as-is, but hopefully helps direct your effort: what can you do to feel more in control of your work? This might mean staying where you are, but it might be finding a different work place that’s better suited to your needs.

> Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out?

By and large- no. Healthcare, social services, and non-profit work have higher burnout rates than tech. But research suggests there are certain profiles of people who experience burnout more acutely and these traits may appear more often in tech: young, single, childless people. It may seem counter-intuitive but older workers have more perspective and experience than young idealists who run into a wall when high expectations don’t match reality, and married people and parents don’t depend on their jobs as highly for fulfillment.

Something you said stood out to me: “I don't have many hobbies (if any) and in the middle of the pandemic there isn't much to do anyway”- do you have activities or things in your life that bring fulfillment? If not, this could be contributing to your burnout (if your job is your only source of fulfillment).

Good luck in your reflections and journey.

I burnt out many years ago, kept ignoring it, went deeper down the rabbit hole and ended up with a major depressive disorder and a serious general axiety disorder. At one point before I went for professional help - too late ofc - when I was close to jump from the next bridge at any moment. It was 50/50 at that time that I would not survive, I was done for good. It took 10+ years of self-exploitation to bring me to this point. I never fully recovered, required serious medication just being able to do the simplest things for a couple of years. Being burnt-out is like being an ex-alcoholic, the wrong work environment and I am back on the self-exploitation wagon. It's not about stress or problems, it's about the self-exploitation. You are doing this to yourself, though the environment you work at may foster that tendency (often intentionally).

I was a rock star at work, invincible, the world was mine until there was nothing left inside me. I gave it all, never kept anything for the way back. I squeezed out more and more without noticing what I am doing to myself metally and physically as long term consequences. It never occured to me that things required more and more from me, even things I did with ease years before. And man, did I party hard, first on weekends only, later on weekdays as well. And serious spending sprees, worse than ever before. I just didn't care anymore. Just to ease the pain inside me that was eating me up. This went on for another year or so until I was done for good, Finished, down for the count in my 30s. I went for help one day, when I sat in tears at home while watching the documentary "The Bridge" on YT. I was the person with the long black hair that is about to jump. That was me, I felt it. I was already mentally there. It's me. I cried. But I had some fight left in me, something just didn't want to give up. Never understood what is was, it made no sense. It wasn't survival instinct. Maybe it was the rock star, that still had one last riff in him.

I wasn't able to work for years, just some pet projects of mine, just for me, silly things, but I could do them at least. Though there were weeks and months I barely could do anything. Even taking a shower took all energy I had left, often I didn't even manage that. During that time all my savings were eaten up, and I landed on wellfare for an extended period of time. My health went to shit as well. But everything was better than going back to the same kind of environment that made me sick in the end, or to phrase it better where I would exploit myself again.

Couple of years passed, I felt stable enough again. I noticed that I started to browse more often for jobs. Not sure what I wanted too do. But I fell into a trap: I looked at money, because I knew I deserved it. I turned down offers after a full interview cycle in the last second, just didn't sign. Jobs others would kill for. Why? I was afraid of falling back into old behaviour. But the banks wanted me, they wanted me so hard, that is were I belong - I thought - the big bonus checks I always strifed for, the acknowledgement I never got at home. But I couldn't get myself to sign. I was afraid. But it felt good to know that the the ones who once turned me down desired me. Saying no, gave me some unknown streangth I hadn't felt in years.

Had a lot of interviews as I grow stronger again. Many rejections, many bad interviews. Either they did not want me, or I didn't want to work there. I took jobs at two startups, thought their ways may help, each a year part, and got fired after a few weeks on each for cause. Yeah, deserved it - I just couldn't deliver anymore, I was not ready, even though the demands were low for someone of my skill. I thought my talent was gone for good, that I lost the magic touch.

Then the right job came along at the right company in an environment I felt safe in. I knew it right away during the screening call. It was clear, that environment cannot harm me. Didn't even had too jump through hoops, it was probably love at first sight; The environment there was for sure toxic by objective standards, but in a different way, a way that could not harm me, that could not not push me over the edge to exploit myself again.

And now the kicker: it was FAANG...

Probalby the one with most toxic, fear ridden environment of all, if you believe stories on the net. But for me it was different. I was very relaxed, sometimes did more hours, somtimes less. Some days I had no productive output, some days I had a lot of energy. But I was able to deliver, the little engine that could, the rock star slowly came back. For me, it might have been the near absence of bureacracy and admistrative overhead. I was given, a lot of freedom, but sure I had to deliver in return. Sometimes there was a lot of stress, sometimes things just sucked, but all in all I never felt pressured to perform in that pressure cooker, I just did and it felt natural.

I saw peers running after the big pay checks, mentally jacking of to the stock value rising. I just didn't care, I was more than decently compensated, probably less than others at my experience level. But I just didn't care, didn't even negotiate or cared what they will offer me initially. When the offer came I just signed, didn't even look at compensation plan details. I was also not that attacjed to physical things and possessions anymore compared to how it has been before, though I could afford a lot. I was also not obsessed with building wealth, sure I build some again. But it could go boom tommorrow and I would have shrug it off. I had a more than decent paycheck, what do I need more?

Maybe that is the result of hitting rock bottom. Who knows? But be aware, rock bottom has a basement, I've seen it...

Right before the pandemic I left FAANG, but only because I wanted to leave the US behind. The America I immigrated once to and that I loved with all its flaws was just not at home anymore. It feelt like place that got stranger to me every day, though I spent most all of my life there. But I felt it was time to go. My FAANG also changed, bot good or better I don't know. But it wasn't my FAANG anymore. The one lesson I learnt during my dark times: There is no lock on the cage! FAANG tried to keep me, said I could work from one of the branches in other countries, even making me really obscene compensation offering that for sure I was not worth. Thank you, but no thanks, I need to go.

There is no lock on the cage!

Now have a job that pays terrible for my skill level, but the fun thing is, I am as stable as I never have been before. I would say I am even on the edge of being happy again 10 years after I completly broke down, though my health lies in shambles, but I just do not care. Just one day after another, enjoying the little things. On occiasions though I notice that I start to exploit myself again. Nah, not gonna happen for sure...

Now that I think of it, I guess I am happy now...

Was there any specific event at work which you think may have contributed to feeling burned out? Or more of a long slow grind of unfulfilling work? AFAICT good therapy is supposed to lead one to self-realization of these triggers, but for me it always felt like it was doing the opposite. Luck of the draw I guess, but I tried three different times with different therapists over several years and it always just made me feel worse and less understood than when I walked in.

The biggest thing that made me feel better was developing goals and an identity outside of the economic system to avoid the effects of work negativity. For me there was a huge project I delivered on at work that flew totally under the radar and was not rewarded. Of course there was more I could have done to promote myself blah blah blah, but getting the worst performance review in years for the work I was proudest of in years was a huge trigger for me.

IMO (don't feel obligated to agree!) anything money touches will feel at least a little inhuman, and it can only get worse once it takes root (like the current direction of "open source" where lots of people treat it like a way to pivot into a corporate job (I did this too lol)). I can't tell anyone what their beliefs and goals should be, and I'm not going to share mine since they are personal and not really relevant, but give them space and time and they will come. It doesn't even need to include technology. That's what I'm good at, so that's the expression I tend to gravitate toward, but the important part for me was to decouple my self-worth from my income. I can handle soul-crushing corporate work a lot better now that I've stopped taking it so seriously. My self-worth comes from ideas that cost zero dollars, and selling my labor is a resource to accomplish things that truly make me happy.

To figure all that out, I took a year off of work at a pretty significant hit to my finances and just went places. It was necessary for me to get out of any familiar environments, including home, just to sever those negative mental links and get some untainted thoughts going. I had never taken more than a couple of weeks off at a time since becoming a working adult, so there was never a time where I was simultaneously old enough to have some experience with the world, old enough to have some money, but not be thinking about what I "needed to do" when I got back.

Have a car. Ignore all the "DAE cars bad???" people — the most interesting places are places transit will never go. My Prius does back roads and gets 60MPG doing it, so it doesn't even have to break the bank. Pick a direction and drive in it for as far as you can stand in a single day. Get a motel room and spend a couple days just "living" in the area. It doesn't have to be touristy stuff. I get the most enjoyment out of things like just driving around, sitting in a park or on a beach, or taking a walk, since the point is to have a clean mental canvas. Unstructured activities are better for this than activities where I have to be in a certain place at a certain time and pay attention to a thing.

Be offline while traveling, and I mean zero contact. Airplane mode, and stash the phone somewhere. All attention parasites must go. I set up Musicolet on my old Note 4 with an SD card full of MP3s so I don't need connectivity for music. OSMAnd provides offline maps, and Torque logs my trip via OBD2. I carry a mirrorless camera (Micro Four Thirds) for photos, and it's way better than anything my phone takes anyway.

Regaining a happy relationship with computers/technology was possible too once I had some time away from them. Things that help me include having a language/ecosystem for personal stuff that I absolutely refuse to ever touch professionally (Ruby for me) and having projects that are intentionally "Free Software, but not open source". Patches are not welcome. My code isn't just "mine" — my code is me!

If I were you, I would...

1) continue meeting with a doctor regularly to discuss treatment options. That could be short-term benzo use, antidepressants, lifestyle changes, as well as going on medical leave. Regular visits also help build up your rapport with your doctor and create a record that you've been seeking help for these issues. Those can be really helpful in the future. For reference, I was seeing my doctor weekly when going through my situation.

2) don't tell anybody at your work that you're experience burnout until you absolutely have to. And even then, limit it to those that need to know (which, likely, is HR and not your manager or coworkers). I've seen a lot of friends be passed over for promotions or interesting projects or even let go after disclosing mental health issues, even for things as prevalent as burnout. Figure out a plan with your doctor first, and then follow your doctor's suggestions on who to contact at work.

3) seriously consider time off, either through a week of PTO or through a more extended medical leave. Yes, it's a pandemic, and yes, you may not have any idea what you do. But, honestly, that's exactly why you need time off. You'll get bored and figure out what you like to do, and that'll open some probably-currently-blocked mental doors on things that might improve your life. For me, I went on a road trip through the southern US and visited national parks I had never been to before. All outdoors, nobody around, never went to restaurants, and brought an air purifier for my hotel room or airbnb. I've also started booking week-long stays at neat AirBnBs with no plans whatsoever... just read, hike around, journal. And even though it feels boring, it's incredibly reinvigorating. But when we're burned out, we forget the things that we love because we're so burdened by our jobs.

4) seriously consider a new job. Another cause of burnout is breakdown in the feedback loop of our work. So we put tons of effort into something, only to shift priorities and not finish a project... or only to have the project handed off to some other team for nebulous reasons... or only to have execs abruptly nix the project... etc. If that resonates, then maybe part of the issue is you're not getting what you need from your job, and it's time to look for something else.

5) double down on self-care. You probably have heard all of the things before: have a consistent sleep schedule, remove screens from your bedroom, go outside, exercise every day, cut down on sugar/alcohol/caffeine, have regular social contact (safely, but FaceTime, etc), reduce your social media usage, meditate, journal, etc. Cultivate hobbies -- what about learning a new language, or learning the guitar, or starting a garden, or learning 5 new gourmet meals to cook.

These issues are really common in tech, and right now life is particularly hard. There's a lot of instability in the world, there's not a lot of things to do with free time, and so we work too hard with nothing to look forward to. It all sucks. But it's great that you've recognized you're not in a great place, as that's the most important first step :)

My best advice is, if you can afford it, quit your job and don't do anything until it sounds good. Like literally sit and stare at a wall until something sounds fun. My recovery was definitely delayed because I thought doing hobbies was how I was going to recover, so I forced myself to try to do things because I though I'd want to have accomplished them after my sabbatical was done.

If you want to call it mediation, call it that. If you want to call it sitting in the shower with a beer call it that. If you want to call it renting a cabin on a mountain to with no internet, call it that. The important thing is you're giving your mind time to (if you will) run a defrag on itself.

I'm still not 100% over being burnt out, so I can't give any guarantee, but giving myself that time has definitely helped immensely.

> Should I tell my boss and/or team? Should I tell them right away, or wait until I know what other steps I want to take? What should I expect their reactions to be?

Hard to say. How's your relationship with your boss/team? If quitting is the most likely outcome, you have nothing to lose, and maybe they can help. If your work reletionships are more adversarial, maybe not.

> Should I take time off? How much? Or should I try to work reduced hours? I'm hesitant because I don't have many hobbies (if any) and in the middle of the pandemic there isn't much to do anyway. I don't think running out of things to do would be any better for my health than continuing as-is. I've been there before and I don't handle boredom well.

In my opinion, yes.

I don't know you or your personality, but for me not handling boredom well was a symptom of being burnt out. Or as I said it, I was "bad at" relaxing. I still am, but I'm getting better about it. And the thing that is helping the most with that is telling myself that I'm allowed to be bored and then scheduling some time to be bored. That might sound stupid, but I really think that is the thing that has helped my mental health recently more than anything else.

> If I continue working, is there something in my working environment I should try to change? Think of senior engineer in a typical DevOps-y SaaS startup.

Can you work less? I've actually started a new gig (2 months after my last day as the last one), but I'm working part time (though salaried w/ benefits) and it's great having more time in the mornings and afternoons. I don't think I could swing a full time gig at the moment, but working half-time has silenced the part of my brain that kept telling me I should be making money and being a contributing member of society.